A thoughtful reader recently shared something that hit home:

In many families, there are various reasons why parents are too overwhelmed to spend valuable time playing with young children. Both parents may work, and some single parents may juggle multiple roles and responsibilities. The stress and fatigue are real.

Absolutely. Thank you.

This is a truth that deserves space and compassion. Many families today are stretched thin in every direction—working multiple jobs, parenting solo, or simply trying to hold everything together while feeling bone-tired.

Here’s the good news: meaningful connections need not be big, scheduled, or perfect.

It can be folded into what you're already doing. Stir pancake batter together and let your child feel the flour. That’s sensory play. Letting them splash at the sink while you wash dishes? That’s bonding. A 5-minute cuddle under a blanket with a silly voice story before bed? That’s a connection. If you’re tired, keep it short. What matters is being present—even in small bursts.

And if you’re feeling exhausted, don't feel guilty. Connection doesn’t have to mean performing. Sitting nearby while your child plays and saying, “I love watching you do that,” is enough to make them feel seen and secure.

Parenting in the Cracks

Parenting today often happens in the cracks—between shifts, on the commute, while juggling dinner, bills, and laundry. Many parents are in survival mode, and the idea of adding “intentional play” to the list can feel like one more impossible expectation. But here’s the good news: connection doesn’t have to be elaborate, time-consuming, or even energetic. It can be small, imperfect, and meaningful.

Remember this: Being tired does not mean that you have failed as a parent! You are human. You’re doing your best. And your child doesn’t need perfection—they need you, your presence, your connection. Over time, those little moments add up to something lasting. Research shows[^1] that even brief, responsive interactions with caregivers significantly support a child’s emotional security and brain development. Showing up, imperfectly and with love, is more powerful than any well-planned activity.

What Counts as Connection?

Many parents think of “quality time” as involvement in crafting projects, floor-play with toys, or elaborate sensory bins—and those can be wonderful! But if those are not accessible right now, that’s okay. Connection can be woven into everyday routines. Here are a few simple ways to make it happen:

• Talk while doing: Narrate what you’re doing while folding laundry or making a sandwich. “This shirt is so soft. It smells like sunshine!” You’re modeling language and attention without needing extra time.
• Turn chores into games: Let your child hand you the pegs as you hang up clothes and spray water on the floor while you mop. Invite them to match socks or stir cake batter. These moments are sensory-rich and relationship-building.
• Pause and notice: Even if you’re not playing directly, take a moment to observe. “I see how carefully you lined up those blocks. That’s creative!” Your attention is the magic.
• Bedtime connection: A two-minute back rub, a silly voice story, or just holding hands during sleep time can leave your child feeling loved and grounded.

For Single Parents or Those Working Multiple Jobs

Presence matters more than performance. Even five intentional minutes—looking into your child’s eyes, listening fully, offering a gentle touch—can have a lasting impact. Your child doesn’t need an all-day play partner. They need to know they’re seen and loved. Let go of the guilt.

Let your child join you in what you’re already doing. Let bath time become a splashy, giggly connection. Let meal prep become a time for naming and smelling the ingredients and rolling the pizza dough.

A Word to Co-Parents

Sometimes one parent is less naturally drawn to early childhood play.

That’s okay too. Connection doesn’t require a silly voice or a love of glitter. Reading a book together, fixing a toy, or sharing a favorite snack can all build strong bonds. Encourage each adult to connect authentically.

The Takeaway

You don’t have to carve out extra time or summon extra energy. Sharing a few kind words, a shared laugh, or a moment of your presence are also great forms of connection.

Those are the moments your child will remember. And they are enough.

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[^1] Shonkoff, J. P., & Phillips, D. A. (Eds.). (2000). From Neurons to Neighborhoods: The Science of Early Childhood Development. National Academies Press.
This landmark report highlights how brief, emotionally responsive interactions between parent and child significantly support brain development and emotional well-being.