The Power of Play: Nurturing Social Skills One Game at a Time

It was a bright Saturday morning at the Little Explorers Preschool beach day. As the children dashed to the shore, buckets in hand, four-year-old Jake proudly built a sandcastle. When Ava asked, “Can I help?” Jake hesitated until their teacher suggested, “What if Ava builds a trench?” With that, the two teamed up. Soon, more children joined, digging and protecting the castle from the waves.

That moment captured something powerful: children were not just playing, they were learning to cooperate, share, and connect as well as having fun.

Why Play Matters for Social Growth

Children are naturally social, but they are not born knowing how to communicate, socialise, or work together. Like reading or math, social skills must be taught and practiced. Play is one of the best ways for young children to develop these skills.

To understand how these social skills develop, psychologist Mildred Parten (1932) identified six stages of play that children move through as they grow:

1. Unoccupied Play (Birth–3 months): Babies explore by moving their bodies and observing the world. This stage may seem random, but it is the start of learning how to engage.
2. Solitary Play (Infants–Toddlers): Children play alone, focusing on their own activity. Here, independence and self-direction are nurtured.
3. Onlooker Play (Around 2 years): Toddlers watch others play but do not yet join in, developing social awareness by observing.
4. Parallel Play (2+ years): Children play side by side without direct interaction. They are comfortable being near peers as they start to mirror behaviors.
5. Associative Play (3–4 years): Children begin interacting—sharing toys and chatting—though not always working toward a shared goal.
6. Cooperative Play (4+ years): Children actively play together with a shared purpose, like Jake and Ava’s sandcastle. This stage is rich with teamwork, negotiation, and empathy.

Studies have shown that peer interactions during play can contribute significantly to the development of empathy and social understanding. In a longitudinal study, researchers found that preschoolers who engaged in more cooperative and pretend play were better at resolving conflicts and understanding others’ feelings by the time they reached elementary school (Eisenberg et al., 2005).

Through play, children learn how to:

• Take turns
• Resolve conflicts
• Understand others’ perspectives
• Build lasting friendships

The benefits do not end in preschool; older children and teens continue building social confidence through games, teamwork, and shared challenges.

Communication Through Play

Whether it is building a puzzle or pretending to be Superman, play gives children a chance to talk, listen, and make decisions together. Young children practice storytelling and turn-taking during pretend play, while older children develop skills like negotiation and respectful debate through board games or group video games.

A study by Ginsburg (2007) highlights that play allows children to express emotions and develop language and communication skills more effectively than in structured learning settings. This supports their ability to connect with peers and navigate social situations.

Learning Teamwork

Cooperative play teaches children to work toward a shared goal. This could be toddlers building with blocks, grade-schoolers playing soccer, or teens solving puzzles in an escape room. In every case, the children learn to:

• Share responsibilities
• Listen to each other’s ideas
• Celebrate group success

They also learn an important lesson: working together often gives better results and more fun than tackling the task solo.  

Handling Conflicts

Disagreements are part of play, and that is a good thing. When children argue over rules or turns, they are exposed to real-life problems and develop resilience and problem-solving skills.

You can support them by:

• Encouraging calm communication (“Use your words.”)
• Helping them take turns sharing their feelings
• Offering solutions like timers or new rules that everyone agrees on

With time, children learn to handle social bumps on their own.

Growing Friendships

Play is also where friendships are born. Those belly laughs during tag or cooperative video games? They are laying the foundation for empathy, trust, and connection.

Try a game like The Friendship Web:

How to Play:

• Give a group of kids a ball of yarn.
• One child holds the end and says something kind to another, then tosses the ball to them.
• Continue until everyone is linked in a web of kind words.

At the end, discuss how kindness makes people feel and how genuine friendships grow from small gestures.

Finally

In a world of academics and busy schedules, it is easy to overlook the quiet power of play.  But every shared game is an opportunity to teach empathy, teamwork, and confidence.  As Parten’s stages illustrate, each level of play, whether solitary or cooperative, helps children take another step toward becoming socially confident, empathetic individuals.

Next time your child is engrossed in imaginative play or teaming up with friends for a game of soccer, stop and observe. They are not just playing; they are learning the social skills that will shape their relationships for a lifetime.

References

• Eisenberg, N., Fabes, R. A., & Spinrad, T. L. (2005). Prosocial development. In M. H. Bornstein & R. M. Lerner (Eds.), Handbook of child psychology: Vol. 3, Social, emotional, and personality development (6th ed., pp. 646–718). Wiley.
• Ginsburg, K. R. (2007). The importance of play in promoting healthy child development and maintaining strong parent-child bonds. Pediatrics, 119(1), 182–191. https://doi.org/10.1542/peds.2006-2697
• Parten, M. B. (1932). Social participation among preschool children. Journal of Abnormal and Social Psychology, 27(3), 243–269.